If I Had $500 For Xmas

We're putting the question to the NZGamer.com staff.

In what will be a regular feature leading up to the big day itself, we're posing the $500 question to the NZGamer.com staff. Up next, Lucy O'Brien

To be completely honest, if I was given $500 for Christmas I wouldn’t be spending it on video games. I would be spending it towards a holiday on some tropical island where all I would do all day would be sip cocktails, read airport novels and mull over the virtues of black pumps and limp balm. But this isn’t O magazine, so onto all things technology.

A Show Off Television

First off, I would put a bit down on layby for a new TV. I’m one of those technologically competitive people who can’t stand to have the year’s previous model; everything I own has to be as up-to-date as possible. If I were rich I would have a servant whose job it would be to research new models of things and go out and buy them for me - his name would be Pepe and he would also walk my many dogs. I currently own a 42 inch Samsung 1080i LCD, which is all well and good, but not as good as owning a 42 inch Samsung 1080P LCD. I want new and I want it now and godammit I don’t feel guilty about being such a superficial consumer.

A Couch Not Obtained From The Salvation Army Or The Tip

Secondly, if you can’t game in style, you’re not gaming at all. The rickety old couch at my flat currently farts when one sits down on it – sure it’s cosy, but an odd match to my (what do the kids call it?) 'gaming rig'. Again this would be on layby - $500 only goes so far – but a nice leather couch would compliment those Modern Warfare 2 high-def visuals nicely.

A Console Born Out Of Nostalgic Longing That Would Ultimately Be Forgotten

To complete my high-def, state-of-the-art set-up, I’d contradict it entirely with an ancient console – the Sega Mega Drive. I grew up with the Mega Drive and was a chronic, un-judgmental renter – from Cool Spot to Altered Beast, I gave everything a try. I view my Megadrive years as highly experimental and awkward - my gaming puberty if you will - and my fondest memories lie with some truly unlikely franchises. Here are my pick of the games:

Cool Spot

To some, just a red dot with glasses, but to others, the embodiment of everything that is cool, Cool Spot was the mascot for 7 Up during the later half of the eighties. He was so cool, in fact, that he had his own game, a surprisingly delightful platformer set in a colourful beach-themed world. The aim of the game was to rescue other identical ‘Spots’ from capture by soda-bubble blasting your way through each level, all the while collecting little red dots that were the equivalent of Sonic’s rings or Mario’s coins. With tight controls and playful level design, you’d never guess the whole thing was one big advertisement for soda.

Aladdin

Based on the Disney movie, this was a side-scrolling platformer that took a little Aladdin through inspired locations, from the dirty streets if Agrabah to the (trippy) heights of the Genie’s palms, all complimented by tinny renditions of the songs from the film. The game was surprisingly challenging – much harder than you’d expect from a Disney title – and the beautiful, cel-shaded animation separated it from the rest.

Krusty’s Fun House

Last of all, my pick of ‘the most frustrating yet awesome Mega Drive game ever made’, Krusty’s Fun House. Taking control of the Simpsons’ Krusty The Klown, the aim of the game was to lead groups of rats through a series of difficult puzzles to their doom. Essentially, you would have to build the ‘pathway’ for the rats (who would just wander in whatever direction you lead them) using pipes, blocks, elevators etc. It sounds easy, but goddamn, when an elaborately constructed pathway failed, controllers in the O’Brien household went a-flyin’. This game gave me my first taste of gamer rage.

So those are my picks for Christmas this year. It’s all unnecessary crap, of course, but hey, we’ve been in a recession. We’re allowed a bit of frivolity.