ZOMG, Retro!: NZ Story

It's not Mario, it's not Sonic, but you gotta love it. Go kiwi!

Welcome to the second edition of ZOMG, Retro! Last weeks column proved so popular many of our members were rubbing Fapo’s nipples, which we are hoping is a good sign… Anyways this week we are back with The New Zealand Story, a game that has a port on almost every console available and currently getting a make-over for the Nintendo DS.

While it’s not as slick as, say, Super Mario Bros, and has a few annoying flaws, The New Zealand Story manages to secure its place as a ‘classic’ purely with charm. As soon as you flick this game on you are bombarded with a cutesy and catchy tune followed by pictures of a cartoon sea-lion stealing a bag of kiwis (wtf?). To say this game is cute is to make a gigantic understatement.

Along the way your kiwi (looks more like a baby chicken) will shoot his arrow, shoot lasers and even throw bombs, as well as commandeering enemy inflatable sheep heads to fly around the level (wtf x2). Much fun can be had either shooting the various inflatables enemies ride around on, sending them plummeting to their doom – for some reason or another it really is more fun than just shooting the bad-guys themselves. Or if you’re more like me, you can jump from one to another seeing how many enemies you can knock off their perch without firing a shot. Are you beginning to see why people love this game?

Don’t let the cuteness let you think this will be a cakewalk. This story is actually pretty difficult. Unfortunately, part of this is because of the flaws I mentioned earlier - sometimes you will die a cheap death from enemies spawning right in front or on top of you. The other unfair death can be had from walking through enemies just as they fire as normally contact with many enemies isn’t fatal. Keep your wits about you though and you can avoid many of these deaths.

The level design matches the rest of the game. Quirky. Each level is a maze, often with multiple routes and shortcuts – some harder than others. What I think is a nice touch is how some routes, often secret ones will be visible from some parts of the levels and when taking these routes you will often see levels ahead and behind of you. Where the fun really starts though is finding the invisible warps – a hint is that your bullets disappear if they hit one. The only downer is that the levels do get repetitive.

A lot of fun can still be had with this game; as mentioned, it’s a lot more basic than many other 2D platformers, but it makes up for this with charm and character.

Available for:

I have personally played the NES version more than any other, which is a very solid version of the game. The original arcade version and the TG-16 version are slightly prettier though. The New Zealand Story is also available for Amstrad, Amiga 500, FM Towns, X68000 and the MegaDrive. The MegaDrive version is based on a slightly modified version of the game. The New Zealand Story also appeared on the Taito Legends compilation for Xbox, PC and PS2. A new remix of the game is in development for the Nintendo DS.