Top 10: Worst Rock Band Tracks


By: Angus Deacon
Published: Friday 17 May 2013 10:00 AM
 
Top 10: Worst Rock Band Tracks

They do not all rock.

Rock Band is a brilliant game and I have a lot of admiration for anything that melds music and education into one awesomely fun package. But following on from Hadyn’s Best Tracks of Rock Band roundup - here are some that never should have of appeared in the franchise.

1. Makes Me Wonder - Maroon 5

The Oxford English Dictionary adds around 4,000 new words with every edition. Yet amazingly, it still contains no words that can describe how comprehensively crap this song is. Maybe extremoshite? Or craptastic? Singing this song is only possible if you have no balls... and no self-respect.

2. Can't Be Tamed - Miley Cyrus

To really drill down and explore how God-awful this song is, let’s take a look at the mad-sh*t lyrics that spew out of Miley’s gob:

“For those who don't know me; I can get a bit crazy; Have to get my way, yep; 24 hours a day 'cause I'm hot like that...”

It takes a real genius to include ‘yep’ in a song. “24 hours a day”... so she’s telling us she’s a bossy bitch even when asleep? Her waxing lyrical brilliance continues in another verse:

“I'm like a puzzle; But all of my pieces are jagged; If you can understand this; We can make some magic, I'm on like that”

Hmmm. Billy Ray’s little girl sure has grown up - which in Hollywood terms means she now dresses like a prostitute. But who the hell cares and why the f**k is this f**king song in Rock Band?!!

Continue reading on page 2.





 

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Comments (8)

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hadyngreen
On Friday 17 May 2013 10:37 AM Posted by hadyngreen
Awesome list! I'd add any of the cover versions to that list especially My Sharona.

Also They're Red Hot from Blood sugar Sex Magik, it's nigh on unplayable.
 
 
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cleggy
On Friday 17 May 2013 1:28 PM Posted by cleggy
As far as that Dream Theater track goes, it could've been worse. They could've picked the title track from that album. All 24 minutes of it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LH_9lJxeiXg
 
 
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Syn-Ryn NZGamer.com VIP VIP Gold
On Friday 17 May 2013 3:24 PM Posted by Syn-Ryn
I recall Go With The Flow to be one of the most painful, repetitive guitar tracks to play, but that's all that comes to mind from the first RB.
 
 
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stupidlikeafox NZGamer.com VIP VIP Gold
On Friday 17 May 2013 3:45 PM Posted by stupidlikeafox
beastie boys - sabotage, and police - message in a bottle were both so painfully dull you could play most of it without looking. ugh.
 
 
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Ron NZGamer.com VIP VIP Gold
On Friday 17 May 2013 3:52 PM Posted by Ron
17 May 2013, 01:28 PM Reply to cleggy
As far as that Dream Theater track goes, it could've been worse. They could've picked the title track from that album. All 24 minutes of it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LH_9lJxeiXg
Welcome back, haven't seen you for ages!
 
 
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Sidawg2 NZGamer.com VIP VIP Bronze
On Friday 17 May 2013 7:56 PM Posted by Sidawg2
Whip it by Devo comes to mind as a drummer.

Last Resort by Papa Roach. The story behind it is pretty good. Might be in one of the nzgamer articles, but it goes along the lines of Harmonix being accidentally sent the version of the song with no post-production on it, which resulted in it sounding like complete bollocks.

Definitely Llama.

Let there be rock (live) is another shocker on the drums.
 
 
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kiwiatlarge NZGamer.com VIP VIP Bronze
On Friday 17 May 2013 10:43 PM Posted by kiwiatlarge
Wasn't SpongeBob Square Pants or something DLC??... I'm serious!...

Worst song ever to play was I think a Beastie Boys song which on Expert Bass was literally two notes played over and over again... Commonly used for the 100% Expert Bass achievement..
 
 
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emetic NZGamer.com VIP VIP Silver
On Monday 20 May 2013 1:06 AM Posted by emetic
I don't entirely agree with the choices there, but yeh there were some shockers. That is to be expected with the million-song library, I guess.
 
 
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