This blog is a little dedication to one of the independant-game reviewer greats, and one of my Personal idols, Ben Croshaw.
Or "Yahtzee" as he is better known as.
In case you don't know him, Yahtzee is a British guy, who wrote a couple of awesome animated reviews, put them on Youtube, and was then hired by the Australian company/website "The escapist" to continue doing them. A feat he was quite surprised by. Quote: "Having someone find your individual idea and offer you a job is like them finding your message in a bottle in a sea made entirely out of messages in bottles."
So what's so great about Yahtzee's review series "Zero Punctuation"? Well, for starters it is true to the Title, and has Zero punctuation. He never pauses and he speaks as fast as a bat out of hell. He is also devilishly charming and funny and will have your sides splitting by the end of a 3-minute review.
He is one of the worlds biggest pessimists though,
He has reviewed over 30 different games now and has only actually admitted to liking 2. PORTAL being one of them (for very obvious reasons).
I would like to attach one of his video's to this blog but due to his tendency to swear once every second second I suppose it wouldn't be quite suitable for this site. Instead I'll give you a few of Yahtzee's hilarious quotes. Sorry but Im totally going to have to become a COPY PASTAA for a sec.
Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles
"Part of Resident Evil's charm is that it still takes itself seriously despite having the most atrociously written story and dialog of any human endeavor since Hulk Hogan took one to many clothes-lines to the head and decided he could act."
"Crysis is so pretty that were it an inmate in a male prison it would be the bitch of every motherf**ker in that place before you could say Andy Dufray."
"Finally, the smartest idea that BioWare had was to leak the idea that there is sex in this game. That probably doubled the sales figures right there because the nerd is a tiresomely predictable creature. To him the promise of boobies is like a sandwich to a starving wolf. "
Devil may cry 4
"The combat in DMC4 can simply be explained as watching a Tarantula and a pray mantis fight to the death while playing some slipknot in the background and then pouring red and green gummi bears over the winner."
2008 E3 Review
"So an appropriatly mediocre E3 has limped past for this mediocre year in gaming. Nintendo have proudly announced thier intentions to make the wii do what it was always supposed to do anyway while Microsoft and Sony busily compete to see who can rip-off each others console the most"
So yeah, I love Yahtzee, even though Im a Nintendo fan-boy who he would consider me to be the scurge of the earth.
So yeah, head on over to www.escapistmagazine.com
to watch some of fantasticly morbid reviews.
(Whoopsie whoopsie boingo knickers is another one of his quotes that he used to break the edge after saying a very serious sentence.) KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, YAHTZEE YOU CHARISMATIC STALLION!
Written by ChatterboxZombie.
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